Friday, 27 January 2017

Books Actually

I have no qualms saying I am slightly tipsy at the moment, as is the spirit of the blog to be honest and hence impenetrable.

I have been reading mostly, for the last 4 days. Reading and reading, just for class, without pause for even going to SPAC. It is saddening but only slightly, because my true tendency is towards knowledge. A lot of what I'm reading is quite frankly, what can be considered 'Western Canon'; and truly I am a Westernized soul. I'm still wondering if Shi Yue lost respect for me just because I wasn't as Pro-PAP as she expects. But I think she is mistaken in some respects. In fact I am quite pro-PAP, in fact I have no problem with Plato and his philosopher kings, if the system he suggests can be approximated in reality. I hesitate to elaborate further naturally, for I know it is not the business of future foreign service members to actively participate in opinions of little basis.

I have reasons for writing again. Chiefly, the age-old... loneliness. I believe Dominic and I understand each other in this regard - the paradox of career and family. I am aware that my 'ambitions' are a natural deterrent to finding a partner. Chiefly, I cannot expect or force a fellow human being to come with me to Singapore and then overseas over the year - women's rights are human rights. So my only slim chance of really finding somewhere to be with, to respect, to cherish, is a person who does want to see the world but loves Singapore as much as I do. It is uniquely difficult.

It was no coffee day today, and I think I succeeded in happiness. I wish everyone happiness.