...Unsure

I came here because I was trying to see if Chris posted anything on her site, and then remembered she was reading or at least remembering what I posted on this blog leading to a lot of texting from me because I felt like something was wrong (but it was over text so I really don't know for sure). She explained how she was feeling upset over something a girl, that I apparently was asking out at some point, had said. And now she is not responding anymore after I drunkenly texted a whole bunch, and I don't know what to say or if I should say anything or what to do really but I'm very scared and anxious and am not studying properly. So since I'm here I'll blog (actually procrastinating).

I'm not sure if she's angry with me, disconnected, or even thinks I'm deceitful or creepy. Or if it's just a mood or if she's just busy and it's not a big deal. I'm not sure if she believes what I said or disagrees with how I think about relationships in general or how we started dating. I probably should not have texted when I was tipsy and it's true I did not want to have a conversation on a phone instead of in person, but I felt so helpless and scared to be honest and I probably would have laid in bed awake all night thinking about it, because I had basically no read on what was going on. Either way, I still felt after replying that I couldn't express myself properly or satisfactorily and there was no reply after anyway, and so it might have been overwhelming. Or maybe I'm the one overreacting though she said she might have been. I think I need to text her again or I I'll stay anxious idk. Or I need to really super distract myself with games or homework... I don't want to force or pressure her to reply just because I can't handle my own sorry ass emotions when I feel terribly helpless in trying to comfort her... fuck I'm terrible. Guess I'll have to try.