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Friday 21 May 2010

Policy of Isolationism

I've always been afraid of being left out. I don't know when it started, but for all I could remember I've always been afraid of being stupid. Its a blessing and a curse. It has made me more aware of the world around me, it had honed my ears to listen to the sharpest details of any conversation. Haiz.

You know, I'm getting a bit lonely nowadays, when I'm at home just playing single player by myself I wish I was out with my friends. When I'm out with my friends I wish I was at home just soloing. Am I getting more anti-social? Haiz I don't know. I used to be very enthusiastic about going out. Well now I'm just an exhausted little fellow. Err I have no idea why I changed the subject all of a sudden either, think theres a lot going on in my mind since I haven't been blogging, yeah sorry bout that if you like reading my blog. Then again, is anyone even reading? Ho ho cheem siol.

Well back to being afraid of being right left out. Is that why I like reading the newspaper? No I don't think so. I genuinely like thinking. Thinking of what I would do in different situations. I like thinking of which side I would take, like say, red shirts or Abhisit. I like talking about politics and current events, sharing opinions, finding like-minded individuals. Unfortunately...its almost like no one reads the newspaper as explicitly me as me. I feel really depressed when they don't. I try to start a conversation on something like that and they glare at me as if I said something wrong. Do they think I'm showing off? Do they think talking about current affairs makes you a boring adult? Can they be that senseless? ....Partly why I like Wei Chung's and Marcus's (both of 'em) company. They are aware of these events and its really fun talking to them about it, having a good laugh together at like 'alabama teacher being investigated' (for teaching geometry by giving the anellergy of 'which angle to shoot the president from') =) At least there are people around me who don't think I'm a show off...

You know its ironic. I mean displaying your knowledge in a field you find interesting applies to everyone. I mean Rifdi does tell me all about Adam Lambert and Black Sabbath etc. Do I think his showing off? No. I know he genuinely loves this topic. Why are they condemning me for reading MM Lee's interview with a japanese reporter word for word when they probably do the same on wikipedia on Robert Downey Jr? Just yesterday Rifdi was talking to me during Iron Man 2 about the Australian band A.C.D.C and a few other things I couldn't hear. I didn't mean to offend him when I said I couldn't hear him a few times. I couldn't tell if he was disappointed, but I was really disappointed myself. I wanted to hear him out, give him a chance to tell me what he knows about something he likes, in hopes that he would hear me out too and we both learn something. Its these mistakes and missed oppotunities that often get me down when I'm out with my friends. I'm making socializing sound like a business venture sighz... "Just enjoy yourself =) " I say.

And I did, Iron Man 2 was a very good movie with plenty of action and witty or just plain slapstick jokes. Plot was built upon nicely from the first although supervillian (Whiplash)'s side story was not fully elaborated, it was a bit of a squeeze for so many different character developments but I still think the script is hell better than Transformer's dialogue... seriously don't understand why anyone would think transformer's is better that any Disney Movie, I'm not insulting the latter, they really do a fine job with their animations and all those kiddish characters or morales and way better than a lof of movies today. I do like Disney movies you know? Its not being childish to watch them, their stories are usually interesting (who would imagine WE landing on an alien planet and not the other way around!) and frankly, I feel a lot of youngsters my age ought to listen to values they teach because they don't seem to practice them.

If you read my blog, would you like me to comment on movies (aka review them?) or talk about current events? Tell me K?

Hey just because its by the same band that sang Teen Titans doesn't mean their songs aren't nice, I mean how does that even make sense TELL ME? Very nice jazz and jovial song, which I prefer most of the time to songs with a lot of emoing, shouting and screaming. You don't have to like it. And yes it does sound like xishuashua

2 comments:

Xtreme said...

Yay puffy ami yumi. Loved them solely because of Teen Titan's opening LOL.

(btw I'm reading your post from top to bottom, so naturally when I comment it's from bottom to top. Most of the time xD)

I haven't watched IM2 since I didn't watch the original but I don't get why people diss Disney (lol) movies. I mean, most of them are really good, and I bet you can't find one less than 3 stars.

ACDC btw is a real kickass dance group. Go search for them on youtube if you got time ^^

You know, I barely read newspaper, I just eavesdrop a lot to get information from friends and family, so you could say I've learned how to 'listen in detail'.

But I really pity that you don't have friends that talk about current affairs. You should have really came into Hwa Chong instead of me. I could hook you up with at least 5 people who easily keep up with current affairs and still have more. It's really sad you don't have that many friends that listen/know.

Anyway you're just getting more lethargic because you've been sleeping late, overstressed, depressed or something along those lines. If you're sure its not any of these, maybe its the group of your friends you're going out with. Tbh I prefer small outings with close friends.

Anyway I doubt you're going to the anti social . Even if you're anti social, it's not severe. You're still talking to more people right?

Finally, there's nothing wrong with the fear of being left out. It's normal.

**I want Halo 3~~~ lololol btw how am I going to pass you ODST/Wars/Reach. Total $120 x.x I give you as your birthday present/o level graduation/christmas present respectively okay? LOL

Li Keen said...

Your right, I think I'm kinda stressed/depressed, and actually I agree with you, I prefer going out with a small group of close friends. In fact, I like going out with just one other good friend. I don't know why people think its weird (what they think its gay? thats immature) and their making me feel weird about it too. I think its weird when your not good friends and you have nothing common to talk about. Thanks, you made me feel much better you know =). I'm always paranoid about myself. I'm a perfectionist.